Rebound Sex: Good Idea or No? Take The Survey.
The Daily Beast defines rebound sex as “loosely considered casual sex that helps you get through the pain of a breakup. It is the more illicit post-relationship coping mechanism." Although there are other ways to cope with a breakup - binge-watch House of Cards on Netflix on Friday nights (the unofficial date night for couples – which I did after my last breakup) or classically cry over endless bowls of ice cream and other delectable high-caloric snacks (I’ll plead the fifth here) – raunchy rebound sex is probably the most fun of the available options. Unfortunately, researchers can't agree on whether having rebound sex hurts or helps the post-breakup healing process but one thing they can agree on is that there is a lot of fun to be had if the sex is safe and consensual.
Although researchers can’t come to an agreement, here are what some people had to say about their experience during breakup sex:
· "I wanted to feel wanted...like I was needed in some way."
· "You're attempting to fill a void. It's holding someone. It's having that element of familiarity and comfort."
· “You gain clarity.”
So, there are some good benefits of rebound sex. When you're in a relationship, you're used to being touched a lot and having that physical intimacy after a breakup can help in the healing process. There's also the act of sex itself. Besides being a fun excuse for a cardio workout (30 minutes on the treadmill does not hand out orgasms), there are actual endorphins released during sex that improve our mood. Let’s not soon forget the number of calories you burn during a good romp in the sack.
Other benefits include being able to explore some of the sexual desires that may have been hindered with your last yawn of a partner. Now that women have given themselves permission to not only explore their bodies while pleasing themselves but to also speak up in the bedroom on things they want to try, women can begin to enjoy sex on more personally pleasing levels instead of just having sex to please a man.
Though the benefits of rebound sex are bountiful, the bad side effects can be disheartening. For many, rebound sex can be about not facing the fact that you're no longer in a relationship where someone's checking in on you or having someone to call your own. It can also be about distracting your heart instead of entertaining your body. Ultimately, rebound sex is temporary and like with any other drug, when you come down off that high, the grieving that you need to face is still there.
So, what are your thoughts on rebound sex? Good idea or not? Don’t forget to share your thoughts on the survey here. I’ll be sharing the results in a separate blog post. Also, don’t worry, it’s an anonymous survey. Your ex won’t know what good fun you’re up to without him (or her).